The last few days have been exhausting. Physically and emotionally. I am not sure how I made it through, oh yes I am. With good friends, family and an amazing husband. Truly. The love and support that was afforded to me over the past few weeks was absolutely life altering. I know many a tear was shed, just by being overwhelmed by the generosity and support I was being shown.
I am not sure what was worse, leaving behind a home I had felt such a deep connection to or facing all that was needed to be done in navigating the unbelievable amount of stuff we had. One of the biggest challenges was sorting our belongings, deciding what to keep and what would be shipped or stored. I thought I had been doing well, not accumulating masses of belonging, I had been clearing clutter and organizing for months, but in the end, I was almost dumfounded by the amount of things we had. And I really hate how regardless of the amount of effort in packing, there is always things at the end that you just wind up chucking into boxes, just to get out in time.
I have started to look at things differently over the past couple of days. I decided not to buy a magazine on the ferry as I knew it was one more thing to have to get rid of in the next few weeks. I now look at things and their value as being the value to me, and not whether or not I could sell it later. I will try and be more pragmatic in any purchases I make (except maybe with shoes) and really think about what items will add to my life, and also, will I need to unload it at some move down the road. I am looking forward to the ease that comes with living without all the trappings of everyday life that I have been surrounding myself with. I am glad a whole lot of my belongings will be going into storage, and not with me. And I know I still have some serious sorting to do before I head off to Italy.
Leaving our neighbourhood, our friends and our home were very hard. Our magical little house, with it's plaster walls, the large warm kitchen, the secret doors, all the nooks and crannies, the enchanting garden. (I also just realized I left behind the board on the bedroom door frame where all the children had their heights measured, whoops). My friends will always be a part of my life and the memories that we created in our sweet little home will also be with me but leaving this home behind was hard, I wore my 'fearless' necklace. Many times as I packed, I would touch the little bird, I needed to be fearless.